


Lola's Inferno

by LtLime23



Category: Mass Effect - All Media Types, Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: F/M, Hurt/Comfort, It's not what you think, M/M, Moderately graphic, Smut, Vanilla, Vega is my favorite squish ball, Voyeurism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-01
Updated: 2020-04-01
Packaged: 2021-02-28 18:42:33
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,641
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23151919
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LtLime23/pseuds/LtLime23
Summary: Shepard just wants to quieten the nightmares.Kaidan wants to be the source of her comfort.Vega turns out to be soft in all the right places.
Relationships: Female Shepard/James Vega, Kaidan Alenko/Female Shepard, Kaidan Alenko/James Vega
Comments: 10
Kudos: 7
Collections: Spectre Requisitions 2020





	Lola's Inferno

**Author's Note:**

> This assignment was a real challenge and I'm sorry if it doesn't quite meet the hot and heavy expectations you had. I hope you can appreciate the time and effort I put in to trying to explore these characters, how they might be thinking and feeling and how this scenario might fit into the Mass Effect Universe. Thank you for pushing me as a writer.

Shepard closed her eyes, breathing in deeply and focusing on the movement of her chest as she tried to fill her lungs. A layer of sweat coated her skin, already prickling as it cooled in the draught of her cabin. Slow, methodical. In and out. The rhythm of her heart echoed through the hand she lay on her sternum, feeling the epicentre of the tremors that wrecked her very soul.

Each breath sought to push back against the banking weight of grief that threatened to crush her. It was always like this. Shepard could fall asleep in an instant but then the nightmares came. She had walked, and she had sprinted through that never-ending forest. Always the shadows licking at her with tormenting whispers, desperate last breaths ringing with terror and circling her mind long after she awoke.

Scrunching her eyes Jane sat up. The covers a mess at her feet as she fought to kick them off. Everything suddenly felt too much, the bed too soft, the air too heavy, her skin too tight. Swinging her legs out of bed she stood. She needed to move, she needed to breathe.

Pulling on a hoodie she savoured the soft pile against her skin, flipping the hood and pulling the cuffs over her hands. Black Alliance issue boxer briefs provided her enough modesty, she wasn’t planning on parading herself through the CIC.

Resting her head against the wall of the elevator she let the vibration of the ship numb her. The hum calming as it quietened her mind allowing her to focus. She let her thoughts drift to her feet, concentrating on the cool checker-plate beneath her toes, imagining the coolth working its way up past her ankles, it was partway up her calf when the elevator came to a stop. Wrapping her arms around herself, Jane padded silently along the hallway of the crew deck.

Not bothering with the lights, the soft glow of the lamp in the Port Observation lounge and the infinite carpet of stars were enough to navigate the small space. With careful movements Shepard silently placed a clean tumbler on the bench. Opening the fridge, she peered inside, just a few cans of tonic sat chilling, she pulled one out. Turning around she traced a finger along the row of bottles, letting the lip of each label catch and drag. She lingered on the bottle of Thessian wine, a 2121 vintage from the vineyards of Dassus, the proximity to the coast giving the fruits a distinctive flavour.

Shepard swayed, clutching at the counter top as a kaleidoscope of images assaulted her. Flashes of explosions sent her muscles flinching, the faces of fallen Asari commandos swam in front of her eyes. She could almost taste the sour mix of ash and eezo that had hung in the air. Jane fought to bring herself back, shaking her head to dispel the spectres. Snatching up a bottle of Salarian gin she splashed a slug into the glass and decanted the can of tonic, crushing the metal between her fingers as she did.

She sipped silently. Chasing the soft bubbles across her tongue and enjoying the spike of bitterness that cut through her as she swallowed. She stared unblinkingly into the vast expanse of the Milky Way.

“I think we’re all struggling to sleep.”

Shepard closed her eyes, resting the lip of her glass against her chin, she sighed. Kaidan.

Alenko stood up. Hidden in the shadows he’d watched Shepard, tracing her silhouette, shading in her tension, feeling the air hang as heavy as the Commander’s shoulders. He could make out the profile of her features, the soft pinks of the nearby nebulae swirling in the glass she held to her mouth, as if she were drinking star dust.

Jane set her shoulders, locked down her emotions and settled herself.

“The end of the world will do that,” she said.

Kaidan laughed softly, taking a step towards Shepard. Jane wished he wouldn’t. She’d seen the linger in his gaze since he’d come aboard the Normandy. She had caught his sideways glances and attempts to appear casual while standing closer than necessary.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Kaidan asked.

Shepard shifted. She saw the dart of Alenko’s eyes as the muscles in her legs had flexed.

“I’m not sure what there is to talk about,” Jane replied evenly.

“Everything and nothing? I guess I’d never thought about what the end might look like, how I’d feel, what I’d want to say to people, you know, to have no regrets,” Kaidan paused, taking another step towards Jane before continuing, “I don’t want to die with regrets,” he said, dropping his voice to a whisper.

Jane took a sip of her drink, turning to face the Major.

“What do you want from me Kaidan?” Jane questioned. She saw double-take cross Kaidan’s face, his features tangled with shock. “What do you want from me?” Shepard said, repeating her words.

Kaidan sighed.

“I guess, I don’t know, Shepard, Jane. I just, I want you to know I’m here for you, to talk to. To share the load. I want you to know you’re not alone, that you can trust someone you know?”

Shepard pulled down her hood shaking out her hair and gave Kaidan a hard look.

“You’re here for me are you Kaidan? And with a semi too, what an honour.”

Alenko shifted uncomfortably, it was true, the sight of Jane Shepard always sent a shiver through him. The power and poise often making his mouth go dry. Being called out only seemed to heighten his arousal as he felt himself swell against his pants.

“I, er. . .” he stammered.

“Don’t,” Jane held up a hand, “just don’t OK. I don’t want to hear another word. Whatever you think, whatever you want to happen, not a chance.”

Kaidan’s shoulders sagged.

“Shepard, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean. . . Look I get it if you don’t feel the same but at least hear me out? Let me show you I can support you through this. Let me be there for you.”

Jane drained her glass and set it on the counter. She couldn’t help the tide of anger that crashed through her and set her jaw like a vice.

“Can you even hear yourself? ‘Let me be there for you.’ Do you even know what those words mean? When exactly have you ever been there for me? Back when we were chasing Saren and you questioned every choice I made? Or on Horizon when you chewed me out for ‘working with Cerberus’, even on Mars you couldn’t help but give me shit,” Jane said, turning away. She could feel herself start to shake, she needed to get away from him.

“Look,” Kaidan stammered, his own desperation made him flinch, “I got it wrong OK, I thought I was doing the right thing, I was serving the Alliance.”

Jane furrowed her brow.

“Kaidan you question everything while simultaneously never having an opinion.”

“Isn’t that what I’m supposed to do? Isn’t that how you know you can trust me?”

“The Alliance can trust you, Major Alenko,” Shepard turned away heading towards the door, Kaidan grabbed her arm, “but why would I trust a man who doesn’t even feel the ground beneath his boots?” Jane shrugged him off once again flipping up her hood and striding out the door.

\- - - - - -

Jane wasn’t sure how long she’d been sat on the crates in the cargo hold. Stacked three high she’d mounted the makeshift staircase, lay back and closed her eyes. It always took her by surprise that such a cavernous space existed within the Normandy. The air was warmer down here, comfortably so and the pulse of the drive-core seemed to cause a kind of soft resonance. While the noise of the drive-core was almost overwhelming in Engineering, here only the low bass tones made it through the bulkheads. The whole space seemed to take on the air of a Cathedral or the belly of some great slumbering beast.

Kaidan stood at the window of the Engineering deck gantry, his hands loosely holding the balustrade. A keen observe may have been able to make out his features in the orange glow of the control panel, his silhouette lost to the shifting shadows. He could see Shepard atop her mountain of cargo, the emergency lights highlighting the paleness of her skin. He wanted to explain. Not wanting to disturb Vega or Cortez he’d hung back here, waiting for Shepard to call the elevator again. Maybe when she’d had some space she’d be reasonable he thought. So, he waited, and watched.

When he saw the lamp next to Vega’s bunk flick on it was almost shocking in its brightness. Jane had registered it too, sitting up and looking for the source. Kaidan became acutely aware of the metal beneath his right hand, his fingertips suddenly alive. He felt the flicker of his jaw as he reached across to the control panel and opened the comm link to the cargo bay.

\- - - - - - - -

James rolled his neck, the crack of vertebrae bringing no satisfaction. Sitting up he folded back the sheets. Even though he knew it was likely only partway through the nightshift sleep would remain elusive. Leaning sideways he pulled a small crate from under his bunk, lifting the lid he started to sift through the contents. Only a few books really, a couple of photos, interesting pebbles and small keepsakes gifted to him in times past. His knuckles brushed against something soft, he froze, closing his eyes and almost sighing in resignation. Standing up he exhaled, letting his head fall back, knowing the tears were already catching at the corner of his eyes. Slowly he began to pace, he’d dreamt of her again.

He brought the soft fur of the teddy bear to his nose, breathing in. The scent of brick and plaster dust overwhelming but beneath, beneath he could just make out the delicate notes of Alice’s innocence.

Lifting his eyes once more he let them settle on Shepard’s.

“Can’t save ‘em all Lola.”

Jane shifted a little uncomfortably, she didn’t want James to think she was prying.

“We try though Vega.”

“We do. And lose sleep over the ones we can’t,” James smiled, “it’s OK Lola I was awake when you came in, I didn’t want to disturb you. Can I come up to your treehouse?”

Jane simply nodded and watched as Vega scaled the crates, settling next to her. With a sideways smile he handed the bear to Jane before lying back, shifting a little to get comfortable.

“There was a girl who was like my little sister, I couldn’t save her, now she saves me,” he spoke quietly, and to nobody in particular. Jane pondered his words.

“She keeps you human,” Shepard stated.

“Yeah. Reminds me I’m a man, that I was someone’s hero in the true sense, that I could keep her safe from the monsters under the bed.”

“You’re a lot of people’s hero James,” Shepard said, she couldn’t keep the sadness from her voice.

“The wrong type of hero, the type of hero you get labelled with. Am I right?”

Jane found herself gently squeezing the bear, she’d couldn’t recall the last time she’d handled such an object. She felt the emotion wedge in the back of her throat. She nodded. Swallowing hard.

“People call me an icon, an inspiration, a hero. They don’t seem to stop and think about what those words mean, the responsibility those titles carry.”

James sat up and looked carefully at Shepard.

“Lola, I’m sorry they haven’t realised yet.”

On the gantry Kaidan shifted uncomfortably. Rooted to the spot by his curiosity it was almost painful to watch, his heart a mixture of anger, shame and disappointment. Yet he didn’t turn away. He continued to trace the contours of Shepard and James, building a map of their bodies while their voices washed through him. He was a fool.

Jane didn’t say a word. James continued his voice barely above a whisper.

“Even if we win this you aren’t going to see the other side,” James watched a single tear spill down the Commander’s cheek, “when they asked you to do this, when you saw the Reapers hit Earth, you put out your fire didn’t you?”

Jane nodded.

“I have to be the Spectre everyone needs me to be, I can’t show weakness, I can’t show fear. I have to be stoic in the face of insurmountable odds. I have to be Commander Shepard, nothing more, nothing less.”

Carefully Vega hooked a single finger against Shepard’s hand.

“When was the last time you lay down your titles and were just you?”

For the first time Jane looked over at Vega, the kindness in his eyes almost too much. She felt as if she were suddenly exposed, caught in the full vibrance of the first rays of a spring dawn.

“I can’t tell you the last time I felt seen.”

Kaidan let his forehead meet the cool glass. The taste of sadness rising in his throat. How did he get this so wrong? He was part of this, part of Shepard’s suffering. His mind raced as he thought of all the occasions he’d failed to see the sadness so clearly etched in her features. Maybe he had done so willingly, maybe he was just another rudderless idiot taking from Shepard, using her to give his ship direction and meaning.

“I see you Lola. I see you hurting. I see how you are trying to keep from drowning. That every death adds a stone to your pockets and sees you take another step into the rising tide.”

“Nobody knows how I’m breaking while they fall asleep. Held captive by the last breaths of all those who have fallen, the howl of their lost dreams,” Jane threw here head back with a bark of laughter, “Jesus I sound so fucking dramatic.”

James grinned, his fingers fully entwined with Shepard’s, he swept out his free arm as if gesturing to a crowd.

“Fight it Lola,” he said, bellowing out across the cargo bay, “don’t lose yourself in this, you might be, we all might be destined to go down in flames. If all we are is a single momentary blinding flash, then so be it. You can choose to set the world alight with your fury until there is nothing left but ash beneath our fingertips.”

Shepard squeezed his hand.

“I’m glad you can be dramatic too,” she said.

“Lola I am all drama,” Vega replied, snapping his fingers with the pop of his shoulders. Jane couldn’t help but laugh out loud.

She swept her thumb across his knuckles.

Such a small movement Kaidan thought yet even he saw the sparks fly. Suddenly his eyes could look nowhere else but at the delicate trail of Jane’s thumb over the hand of James Vega. The air suddenly seemed to hang pregnant with a want that had seemingly come from nowhere while lying in plain sight. Alenko barely registered he was holding his breath.

Jane held Vega’s gaze. She daren’t look away, suddenly acutely aware of how close the naked torso of her Lieutenant was, the feel of his hand in hers already too much.

“Can there still be beauty in hell?” she whispered.

“Yes, and there can still be escape in darkness.”

Jane swallowed, letting go of Vega’s hand, she reached out and placed her palm on his chest. Blinking slowly, she gently pushed, feeling the merest hint of resistance before Vega lay back. Shepard splayed her hand, taking in the texture of his skin and the heat that seemed to rise with each heartbeat. Not breaking eye contact she carefully placed one knee, then the other on either side of his hips before lowering her weight onto his stomach.

“Will you keep me safe?”

James held her gaze, felt the lick of her flames against his skin. He’d never seen a more beautiful sight. Placing a hand on hers, the other resting on her left thigh he nodded.

“I’ll keep you safe Lola.”

Kaidan felt the heat rise in his cheeks. With resignation he let his hand find his belt buckle, shifting it in the hope of relieving the pressure, the tight material of his uniform pants uncomfortable. He swallowed as he watched Shepard trace intricate patterns across Vega’s chest, saw the flex and flickers of want shimmer across their skin. Alenko followed the dark lines of Vega’s muscles, marvelling at the contrast of his skin against the paleness of Shepard. It was only the feeling of the air cooling that told Kaidan he’d licked his lips. With a soft moan he found his thumb tracing the head of his hardon through his pants as his eyes locked onto the bulge in Vega’s pants.

“You’re beautiful Lola,” James said as he ran his palms up her thighs and skimming the flow of her hips as Jane closed her eyes focusing on only his touch. Vega let his fingertips catch Shepard’s wrists, drawing small circles on delicate skin, “people only see how strong you are but you’re also delicate, you have fragile spots that need to be handled with care.”

Jane let out the breath she’d been holding. She unzipped her hoodie, letting it fall open. James guided Shepard’s hands to her own collarbones, encouraging her to trace their path.

“See how elegant these lines are?” James whispered, “feel how soft the skin is here, just below your ear, how its texture changes.”

Jane was lost to herself. A weight suddenly lifted as she gave herself permission to feel. She ran her hands over her neck, into her hair, pulling a little before moving down. The flutter in her chest as her fingers wove threads across her ribs and stomach, down the outside of her thighs. Her breath catching as she let a single nail draw back up the inside of her leg.

James simply let his hands rest on her hips. He continued to whisper, reminding Shepard of her beauty. How feminine and delicate, how strong and powerful, how perfect she is. That she deserves to let herself feel, roll her shoulders into the fire.

Kaidan had his eyes closed. Listening to Vega’s words he felt his heart jump. Unbuckling his belt and unfastening his pants he gasped a little as he pulled out his cock. He couldn’t help but lightly stroke himself, feeling the heat and flush as more blood rushed to meet his touch. James’ whispering to Shepard had stirred something in him, he wished he could feel Vega’s lips move against his ears as he spoke those things to him.

James felt Shepard’s hips start to shift, her butt moving against his boner as she started to grind into his stomach. Carefully Vega sat up, giving Jane time respond, scooting to straddle his thighs. Wrapping an arm around her waist to keep her close, Vega guided Jane’s hand to his bulge.

“Feel what you do to me Lola?” He said, “how I can’t help but get hard for you?”

Jane let out a soft moan as she felt a wave of her own arousal crash through her. She was suddenly aware of the flash of heat between her legs. Resting her forehead on Vega’s shoulder she revelled in the sensation of feeling his cock pulse against her. Almost gingerly she released him from his boxers, biting her lip as she felt him fully.

Shepard let her free hand slip inside her own underwear.

James couldn’t keep the growl from his voice when he spoke.

“Touch yourself Lola, fall into how good it feels, how alive your body is. Let your want catch in your throat.”

Shepard began to tease herself. Carefully trailing her wetness around her lips, tracing orbits around her clit, avoiding a direct hit, but coming close enough to hint at what was to come. Feeling her heat, focusing on the change in skin texture or the gradual thickening of her tightly cropped fluff. The cooling of her wetness heightening the sensation.

“I can’t remember the last time I was this wet.”

“I’m weak for you Lola.”

Kaidan had thrown himself back against the engineering bulkhead, one hand furiously stoking his cock while the other was under his shirt pulling and teasing his nipple. God he was so close. The husky growl of Vega’s voice driving him crazy. Alenko was imagining how it would feel to run his hands over James’ shoulders, feel the power and pull. He imagined getting on his knees for the Lieutenant and what it would feel like to have the head of his beautiful dick slide across his tongue. The fantasy flickered and changed, James bending him over a cargo crate, strong fingers grabbing a fistful of his hair as he felt James’ hardon press against his ass.

“Fuck me Vega, please,” Kaidan moaned.

Snapping his eyes open Alenko felt white with horror as he realised what he’d done. Shepard and James were looking straight at him. Kaidan saw the fury flash across Vega’s face. With a strangled groan of shame Alenko felt his cock jump in his hand, ropes of cum lacing the air.

Kaidan didn’t look up when he heard the hiss of the elevator door open. In utter dejection the Major dropped to his knees in the pool of his own embarrassment. He couldn’t believe he’d ended up here, although in hindsight how could he have expected to end up anywhere else? Who was he really? Did he even know where to start when answering that question? He could feel the eyes of James and his Commander, he could almost taste the pity in the air. Made all the more crushing by Commander Jane Shepard’s words. Delivered with a quiet, tired disappointment.

“We should go.”


End file.
